Grown up

Growing pains? Perhaps. One day you are a person, the next you are a grownup (a Lawyer, a Mathematician, a Waiter, a Wife).

***

It's time to grow up. It's time to become serious. I'll be a righteous member of the grown-up society. It's easy. No problem at all. Starting today I'll just stop to be who I was yesterday and mould myself into the expectations. I'll forget my old friends. Why would I need them, when now I will have colleagues? We'll stick to two or three conversation topics that we pretend to have interest in, because we were told that we ought to. What a great change! I won't have to think what I'll say. I'll have several widely known phrases to choose from and just drop them when my turn comes to say something. No need to remember all those birth dates because there will be always that one person that makes her business to know such things and to inform us. I won't need to worry about funerals either, things will be taken care of by someone in the name of us all. When I said serious, I meant it. No more laughing, no more witty jokes. No need to overwork your brain, everything is already prescribed anyhow. We'll tell each other worn old jokes everyone already knows, make a grimace simulating mild amusement and that will be enough. It's the safe way. No one will miss our too clever points, or laugh if we end up saying something, well, not so clever after all.I will go out once a week. At the same time. With the same people. At the same posh place (the more posh the better). And look at the same posh people, posers, standing there to be noticed and never to notice. My fashion sense has to be appropriate. My new colleague-friends already have the list of places to shop at. They will be there for me to help me choose the best outfits that will fit in and consequently make me fit in. Is that too much to ask from life, to fit in? And yes, I will find a husband. Must do that soon before all appropriate ones are snatched. "How do you do. Tell me about yourself: income, position, ambition, wealth, real estate, family tree and references." Nothing without references! I plan to be an exemplary wife. To satisfy my husband's need not to be bothered after a hard day at work. Being a career woman too, I'll have to learn to balance my work and my motherly obligations. I've heard that the boarding schools do miracles for a child. The younger it is sent, the better chance in life it will have. Won't it be great to live this grown-up life?

***

Grey glasses for life. Different shades of grey, but nevertheless, same good old safe colour. The choice of masses. How sad, yet how true.

In memoriam

Some pains are too strong to be expressed by words. Some memories too wonderful to ever be forgotten.

To a sorely missed friend.

Dušan Heđeši

04.09.1981 - 20.03.2006

Stella's Winter Dream

On a cloudy March afternoon, little Stella Goldilocks fell asleep in front of her TV in between of two series of ski jumping competition in Lahti.
Everything was strange when she woke up: there was snow everywhere, men and women in tight outfits were whooshing around her on slender skis and the lazy balloons in vibrant colours floated in the air above her head. She new this place because she has been there many times in her dreams. It was the WinterPark land.

Looking around she saw the Hills in the distance and she instantly knew what she must do: she had to get to the Three Hills. She was worried because the Three Hills seemed so far away, and she didn't have any mean of transport. So she hid behind a tree and jumped in front of the first whooshing person that came that way. The poor man was so stunned by her appearing in front of him out of nowhere that he ended up flying head-over-heels and landing in a thick snow few meters from little Stella Goldilocks. Then Stella run to the men in snow, took his slender skies and whooshed her way cross-country to the Three Hills. (Only later she learned about an incident that made the world cup leader loose his title in the last race of the season due to mysterious circumstances.)

***

It was a wonderful though slightly windy day in the WinterPark land. The happy family of three jumping-bears was returning to their humble abode: the Hill. Coming near to their destination, the first and the big German jumping-bear called Martin stopped abruptly and said angrily: "Someone was jumping from my K115 hill!" At these words the second Swiss jumping-bear called Simon looked at the second hill and exclaimed: "Someone was jumping form my K90 hill too!" The third Austrian jumping bear called Andreas, now truly alarmed, looked at the third hill and said: "Look! Someone is jumping from my K64 hill just now!"

The three jumping-bears now looked all at the little Stella Goldilocks as she was landing from the third hill. Their anger subsided as they watched her graciously making the telemark: she was so little, so sweet and had the most adorable gold locks that were floating on the wind. By the time our little Stella stopped in front of them they were all ready to forgive her the intrusion and ask her to stay forever on their Three Hills.

***

The rest of this story stays forever concealed from us, as the so-familiar voice of Mr. Goldstrum woke Stella up from her dream with the start of the second series of ski jumping competition in Lahti.